Monday, March 28, 2011

We live as if we are never gonna die and die as if we have never lived

Dear Peby,
I wanted to talk to you when I came for the Carnival but couldn't because of the crowd and the atmosphere, yet your sorrow and self pity was palpable,one could tap into a certain sense of nostalgia and mortality,while roaming the past bylanes of Irla Gaothan. As an younger person it seems difficult to dole out advice,but you must take a leaf out of my life, with multiple blockages, diabetes and high blood pleasure I have not changed my life style.
Time is the psycological enemy of man and we all will have disabilities as we grow older, but we cannot stop living our lives out which is a gift. During my own career as I never went to the Gulf like all Mallu's it was a lot of struggle initially. For many years, I went two steps forward and one step backward. Sometimes you too will have to take steps backwards and one step forward because of your disability. I know your condition is deteiorating and shirt is always hanging out to cover your narrowing shoulders. Are you happy with what you have achieved? Between the time constraints and pressures of the corporate world and my quest to make meaning out of this everyday journey of life, living a full life is a sojourn we must savor in our lifetime.
I am not inerested in entering a casket as a well preserved body like a pickled melon.preserved in brine and to be lowered in to the ground. When I leave my body will bear more scars than a crucified Jesus, all the skid marks of an abusive life will be there. Lungs black with smoking, kidneys failing due to alcholic refreshments, bones all fractured and patched up due to accidents and fights, heart broken at the many woman who came into my world and gave meaning to my life,body fluids drained due to years of sex, body worn and withered, but my spirit will be alive shouting Wow what a wonderful journey my life has been! I have no time for remorse.
Success for me is to have a nice family and to be able to have a sense of fulfilment. If you get commercial success, it’s a bonus. I have travelled the world, for achieving personal and business success, networking skills and ways of overcoming challenges. It’s sheer chance, that I went into Audio Visual design and consultancy. Today there is too much pressure on children to do well academically and go to a University for higher studies My daughter is studying for her MS in International Finance after her postgraduation in Economics because she wanted to, earlier she was not keen on studies we waited till she found her path.
There are many children who are doing what they don’t want to do, or are not sure what they would like to do, but their parents make them do something tough academically. If you do something you love, there is a good chance that you will be successful in it. We sometimes try to force our insights into our children and dont allow them to grow on their own make their mistakes and make their lives. Our own hidden insecurities surface and we try to protect them and end failing miserably. Intellect is itself a mode of exxageration and destroys the harmony of life.



It’s tough, but you have to pretend that you are a basket ball, not a basket case. You fall on the ground and you have to bounce back again. It’s not a nice thing to be, but sometimes you have to do it. Sometimes, you have to look at someone else, who could be in a worse situation than you are. You have to keep in mind things you are good at; and everybody is good at something. There is only one of you and only one of me, in the world. Try to find something that you like doing; music, for instance, is a powerful thing. You also have to find someone, who could be your friend.

Phew! That was one long passage, a sort of sermon before I mount.Ha ha Vinay

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